"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
