so that wasnt chicken after all
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
