If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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