what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
its liver damage thursday
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
