Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
