You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
