he wants to bone in the snuggie
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I need a beard to bite.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
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