thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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