I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
