I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize