Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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