wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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