If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize