So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
home. puking in laundry basket.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
