so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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