I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
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