So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.