Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
