She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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