I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Randomize
