so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
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