it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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