it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
