there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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