:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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