no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize