I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
this will be a night to untag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I'm at about main and main street
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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