Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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