it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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