just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize