fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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