so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
worst night to have a conscience
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
