is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are two peas in an std pod
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize