What a fucking waste of an outfit
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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