I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
