We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
