p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
