He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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