I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
