hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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