Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize