I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
false alarm, still single
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
