I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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