I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
