Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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