she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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