She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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