why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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