She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
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He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
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I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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