i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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